Seperate beds

Once a upon a time a young lady got married. She was very excited to share a bed with her new hubby because that would mean cuddling... and lots of it! They would be sharing a full size bed so it would be perfect. Or so she thought.
She didn't realize that her hubby liked space and LOTS of it. He enjoyed having his own blanket as well because this young lady didn't know she was a blanket hog in her sleep. Oh, hubby would try to cuddle, but it lasted only a little while and then he would turn over to enjoy a night of noncuddling sleep. The young lady was very hurt and took it personally. She addressed the issue and hubby reassured her it wasn't anything to do with her; he just liked his space... and lots of it!
Time passed and hubby talked the young lady into a king size bed. She was very against this idea because to her, that meant no cuddling at all. How could they? The bed would be HUGE! But because she wanted him to be happy she went along with the idea and out went the cute little bed and in came in King Kong.
She felt completely lost and lonely in the sea of mattress. Hubby, on the other hand, was lovin' life. Over time, though, she grew to appreciate the space. She was a tired mother of two and needed the sleep. Something had happened to her hormones as well because she became a heat generator. She didn't like anything on her or anyone too close to her because she would sweat, alot, and that was not good.
Many years passed and the bed became old and soggy. The mattress just wasn't as comfortable as it once was and it was time to replace it. Unfortunately, they couldn't afford another king size bed so they down-sized to a queen. Hubby was very content with the new bed because, unbeknownst to the young lady, he had become a CUDDLER. However, some changes had occured over the years. The young lady now enjoyed her space and with the heat generating condition she had, she didn't want to cuddle anymore. She also became attached to a pillow that she would use for her shoulder to alleviate pain which, in turn created a 'barrier' in the bed. She wanted peace and quiet; hubby preferred to sleep with 'waves' to drown out any noise. She would be woken up by the slightest movement in the bed, while hubby, slept pretty soundly. Not only was she missing that King Kong of a bed terribly, their sleeping habits had changed so much that seperate beds were sounding very nice.
This idea freaked hubby out! 'Are you not happy?', 'Is there something I should know about?'
No, nothing like that. It just seemed that with the many years of marriage, countless hours of lost sleep,( i.e. children), and general stresses of life, the young lady was just needing something of her very own. Something she could crawl into and curl up in and enjoy all to herself. Something that she could lose herself in for a few hours every night, alone.
Hubby did some research and after much pondering decided his young lady's happiness was very important to him so he agreed.
He agreed...

It is very strange how when you think you really want something and someone decides they are going to help make it a reality, it makes you think twice...

I've been reading alot on married couples sleeping in seperate beds and couples who have seperate bedrooms. Why? First of all, I'm tired. We have a crappy bed and I can feel every little movement. Every move wakes me up. I haven't had a decent night's sleep in a LONG time. The idea of jumping into my own little space, with my own blankets, and sleeping any old way sounds so appealing to me. Second, two twin beds are alot cheaper than a king.
At least it WAS very appealing until Bobby did his research, and, after getting over the shock of it and receiving much reassurance that this wasn't the first step to divorce, and deciding he would go along with it. Now that I have the green light, I'm not so confident. I have to confess that now I'm a little worried that he'll REALLY like it. This could be temporary for me, a phase. I want it to be difficult for him because I don't want him thinking, 'Hey, we should have done this ages ago!'
I want to call the shots and be in control!

There you have it. My deep dark secrets and not so secret issues. Will it happen? I don't know. I must say that I'm pretty lucky that he is so flexible and isn't controlling. He's a pretty laid back, go-with-the-flow kind of guy. Maybe if I give it more time we will synch and finally be on the same page and how will that happen if I give him all that space...
;-)